Hmm....calm is key to life, without calm, there is no life.... (September 15)

    People say (or at least some people say) that I come up with some nice quotes and that right there means a lot to me. Like for example, "calm is key to life, without calm, there is no life". When I say that, I mean when you are not calm (or when your body isn't calm), you tend to stress out easily and not think. When the world is passing by and you do not have time to breathe, then your body isn't calm. When I mean by that there is no life, I mean there is no time to relax and chill and enjoy life. I don't mean anything suicidal and for people to take it offensive so please don't take it wrong.
    When drama is going around school and you are pushed for time, then you have no calmness but you have (what I call) darkness. Darkness (I refer to as) is when you have nothing but work and school and no break and you run none stop to get everything done. Personally I have darkness because the fact that I have no time (unless I'm lucky) to have a break. I get stressed out easily and I know that but what I do is to find my calm (which is paintball) and that helps a lot. When people try to bring drama near me and put me down, I do push-ups or any exercise to get my mind off of that. Lately, people come up to me and try to throw things at my face, but I try to stand strong and hold my walls.
    I don't know if I will ever have a break (maybe I'll have a break when I die) because I'm like a horse, I don't stop working until I literally pass out or die. I try to achieve everything while doing my chores but sometimes that never happens. I always tell myself, "pearls before swine". What I mean is that I try to give people my all and they either accept it or put it down the drain. I have seen lately in my eyes people have become more...aggressive. Everyone thinks they can solve anything by fighting or drinking or doing drugs. I sit here and just type my feelings and for anyone to read these posts, have full rights to either close out this page or read. If you do read them, I hope you may help. For those who close the page, I thank you for coming and hope you may help others with their calm and for them to live lives and become happy. I always tell people, "I do not care if I am happy, as long as you are happy and living your life as you want it to, then I will be happy". People always tell me, "we want you happy to", and I simply say "I don't care". I never mean that in a bad way, I simply say that because I will only be happy if the world will be happy. I have given up on trying to make myself happy because that will never work.
    I got invited to a movie night but I don't know now if I will go because of conflicts that just took place. I wouldn't mind going but I do not want to make anyone mad or anyone annoyed due to me being there. I have saw a quote one time that said "if you find your goal and you have two paths to take, how will you go about taking those paths? By guessing which one to take or by following what your mind and heart say?". What I think it meant was that once you have set a goal, you will find obstacles. When you arrive at the obstacles, how will you be able to overcome them? By just simply choosing one and not the other and go from there or actually set down what you know and think where you should go. I might be wrong but no one has came up to me and told me different. Well I will stop here and simply close by saying this: "when you calm your soul, your mind will react and be calm. When your mind is calm, then so will your heart...then body...then your atmosphere." I hope everyone has a great night and a good tomorrow. LATER PEEPS!!


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-The Jap Files